“Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone. And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her. Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her. And she had a garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king's daughters that were virgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after her. And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying. And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house. But when king David heard of all these things, he was very wroth” (2 Samuel 13:15-21).
Introduction
We understand from these verses that Amnon was a despicable and wicked person. He got what he wanted by force and then forced the person he claimed to love away from him. We can only imagine what kind of ruler he would have been if he had lived to take his place as king of Israel.
Hatred
In our previous study we saw that Amnon was lovesick for Tamar, but now he was just sick of her. His passionate love was quickly transformed into passionate hatred. He loved her and then loathed her. The fact that his heart was not satisfied with the immoral act he committed against his sister proves that he was in bondage to sin. No amount of sin would have been able to fill the black hole in his nature, for in subjecting his pure sister to such a depraved act, he felt dissatisfied and empty. “Bread of deceit is sweet to a man; but afterwards his mouth shall be filled with gravel” (Proverbs 20:17). Unless his wickedness was curtailed he would have been seeking worse things to feed his sinful heart. We know that Amnon pleaded with Tamar to be with him, but now in a few words he tells her to get lost. No doubt her presence was condemnation enough for his sin.
Heartless
He only thought of himself when he forced himself upon Tamar, and he was thinking of himself when he refused to listen to her pleas. Some commentators believe that in forcing her out and ordering the door to be bolted, that Amnon was trying to make it look like she had been pestering him. This may be the case since he was stronger than her so did not need to lock the door to keep her away. It is also possible that he was fearful that she might creep into his house to kill him. Whichever way it was he was attempting to make her look like the guilty one.
Heartache
Tamar was obviously beside herself with grief over what she had just endured, so ripped her costly clothing and put ashes on her head. The tearing of her virgin’s garment revealed that she had been dishonoured in some way. Though she was the innocent party, she expressed the shame that she felt in a way that words could not. She wept bitterly and loudly.
Soon her brother Absalom heard that his sister was crying and quickly realised the possible reason for it. Maybe he, unlike David, had suspected that there was something untoward about Amnon’s request for Tamar to nurse him better. His direct question about him leads us to think that he might have already seen the signs that indicated that Amnon was a wicked person. If this is the case, then it is a sad indictment on David that he was not aware of his son’s character. Absalom asks his sister to tell no one about what had happened and that he would deal with the issue soon enough. We can understand that he was deeply angered and troubled about Tamar’s humiliation at the hands of Amnon and that he would not rest until he was dead. Absalom might sound cool, calm and collected, but underneath he was a raging bull planning his vengeance on his half-brother. The outwardly quiet way he was dealing with the matter was only because he did not want Amnon to get suspicious and so flee from the scene.
Tamar’s heartache did not end there, for she would have to live the rest of her life cut off from the rest of society. Absalom’s home would have been a virtual prison for her. She would never be allowed to marry, no one would want her anyway, nor receive a place of honour in the royal court. We should not blame Absalom for any of this, for he was only trying to protect his sister in the best way he knew how. For the time being it looks like the guilty party is getting off scott free, but soon he would pay for the crime he had committed.
Hopeless
David was said to be wroth [angry] at what Amnon had done to Tamar, but his response was totally inadequate. He must have known what the word of God demanded for such a wicked deed as this, but he hopelessly failed to administer justice. “If a man shall take his sister, his father's daughter, or his mother's daughter, and see her nakedness, and she see his nakedness; it is a wicked thing; and they shall be cut off in the sight of their people: he hath uncovered his sister's nakedness; he shall bear his iniquity” (Leviticus 20:17). The death penalty was called for but it was ignored. Not only was David being lenient but was sending the wrong message out to his family and kingdom. “Was no punishment found for Amnon? Was he allowed to remain in the palace, the oldest son of the king, with nothing to mark his father’s displeasure, nothing to neutralise his influence with the other royal children, nothing to prevent the repetition of his wickedness” (W. G. Blaike). By keeping quiet and failing to deal with the issue, David was paving the way for additional problems, and leaving the door wide open for Absalom to murder Amnon. Maybe he felt that he could not do anything since he had also compromised himself with Bathsheba.
Conclusion
Once again we see that no man or woman can sin in isolation, but will either influence or affect others too. The consequences of one man’s crime damage many more lives before too long. It would be two years before Absalom would make his move on Amnon, which means that his fury had increased rather than abated. If David thought that the problem would go away by itself and be forgotten, he was wrong.
© 14/6/2010